so fucking domestic.
In a small two bedroom apartment you shared with a coworker,
But who am I to judge, I still lived with my parents.
But you, you were so proud of your small space with your very own kitchen where you would insist on cooking me fancy dinners.
you were a wonderful cook.
but you had crooked teeth,
and you talked during movies,
and you ran your fingers through my hair,
and you were so fucking happy when I agreed to stay the night.
I was so young,
and in the habit of running.
I know you wanted to,
I know you tried
but nothing you did could make me stay.
(your space was too small for the both of us)
and officially in a large amount of pain.
all the callouses on my hands and feet are gone and I lost a lot of muscle, i can barely even do my basic tricks.
but hopefully I’ll toughen back up soon and then this horrible woman they were forced to hire to cover for me can leave. I knew her from before so I knew she was a mean person and horrible and lazy and crazy manipulative but my boys didn’t know that. Although they’ve all told me they’re so happy I’m back now cause they can’t stand her anymore.
I’m actually closer with them all now then I was before I got sick. my first three nights back and one of them I actually slept in one of their rooms cause we were drinking and I fell asleep. and then another has been knocking on my door to hangout nonstop. and they’re always making sure I’m coming to take a drink with them. (and they’re all amazingly good looking so I’m more than okay spending all my time with them)
If I didn’t know Ashley (the one who covered for me) as well as I do I would feel bad for her. because it’s blatantly obvious that they prefer me to her. But she is one of the worst people I’ve ever met so I don’t feel bad, and I actually love the way the boys pulled me back into the group so fast.
as soon as I’m back to my old level everything will be perfect. I just have to survive that long
Back to cancun tomorrow (I guess it’s today now) and I have to be up in 4 hrs and I cannot fall asleep
This is bullshit